In The Depth of Winter
by ForeverCountingStars
Summary: Katniss Everdeen's life changed forever the moment they called her best friend's name. For, it was only after in which she got to know the baker's son, and only after, did she truly begin to fall. AU. Everlark-centric. Hints of Katniss/Gale.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own the Hunger Games, nor Peeta for that matter.

* * *

******In The Depth of Winter**

* * *

_"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer."_

___—Albert Camus_

* * *

**1.**

"Gale Hawthorne!"

His name echoes through the chilling air, and suddenly, she finds that she can no longer breathe. Katniss Everdeen watches as her hunting partner makes his way towards the stage, fists clenched, his face filled with anger. _Not Gale_, she thinks to herself, _take anyone else_. _Take anyone but him_. It would have been his last year. If Gale had just gotten through today's Reaping, he would have been free from ever having the chance to participate in the Games. From the very thing that has dictated Panem for seventy-four years. Free, but not yet safe.

Gale would have have had no other choice but to work in the mines, hundreds of feet below. It's at the mention of the mines that memories of her father begin to resurface. They flash through her mind rather quickly, nothing more than fragments, bits and pieces that she may soon lose with time. Yet, they are enough for her to recall the man even the birds stopped to listen to, but also of his tragic death.

Gale had lost his father too in the mine explosion, and though they were not yet friends, she remembers how he stood the day the children of the dead received a medal of honor. Broad and strong, as if nothing in the world could ever keep him from reaching his goal, which at the time, had been only about keeping his family alive.

Her thoughts are interrupted by the feel of someone watching her. Katniss turns her head slightly, and at the corner of her eye, catches the baker's son staring right at her, his expression sympathetic. She shoots him a glare, which to he responds with a small smile.

She focuses her attention to the stage once more, only to find Gale looking between them, as if trying to figure something out. Effie Trinket rambles on, but Katniss Everdeen is no longer paying attention.

Instead, she continues to look towards the ground, fighting hard to hold back tears.

* * *

He doesn't know what he's doing there, waiting in line to see the one person who he probably despises the most. But Peeta Mellark does not change his position.

The guard motions him to enter as another escorts Katniss Everdeen out of the room. Their eyes meet, and he can feel her question bubbling beneath them. Why are you here? If only he knew the answer.

He can't deny that she looks beautiful, despite her state of mind. Peeta has never lost anyone close to him, but knows that it is painful, nonetheless. Gale and Prim are all she has, he realizes. The only thing he truly knows now is that Katniss cannot afford to lose anyone else.

But a small part of him can't help but wonder what would happen if her best friend did not come back home alive. He witnessed firsthand the effect her father's death had not only on Katniss, but her entire family. He shudders at the memories, knowing that it can't happen again.

Gale doesn't meet his eyes as he walks in. Peeta takes a seat across from him, his eyes averting to the floor before him. Neither say anything for several seconds, an uncomfortable silence already setting in when Gale speaks up.

"What are you doing here?" He asks Peeta, his expression solid stone.

Peeta clears his throat. He wants to wish Gale luck, to tell him that he can make it back if he fights hard enough, but the only words that come out are, "do you love her?"

Gale pauses for a moment, as if thinking of an answer. "I don't see how it's any of your concern, Mellark." Anger takes over in his eyes, all confusion quickly vanishing.

"It doesn't," says Peeta, still not meeting his gaze. "I just… I just wanted to let you know that if either of your families are in trouble or need help… that I'll be there for them."

"I see the way you look at her, Mellark," says Gale. "I know this is about her, that she's the only reason you're offering this, but I… I appreciate it. When I don't come back–" He stops suddenly, placing his head in his hands. "When I don't return, they'll… they'll need it."

He does nothing as he watches Gale break down, the shock finally wearing off. He knows he should get up and give him privacy, but cannot bring himself to leave this boy just yet. Because for the next few weeks, Gale Hawthorne will not have anyone else. After two minutes, Gale finally looks up, and Peeta sees that he has not been crying.

The door opens, and Peeta, giving Gale a final nod, turns to leave. The door is only half-closed when he hears a whisper; one so soft he could have sworn he did not hear it.

"Keep her safe."

Always, he thinks.

He would keep his promise. He would not let Gale down. In several ways, Gale being chosen was one of the worst times of Peeta Mellark's life, but also one of the best.

For to protect her, he must first get to know her.

* * *

It is not until he exits the Justice Building that Peeta realizes what Gale had been doing.

He had been letting go.

* * *

Gale Hawthorne is on fire. Literally.

The eyes of the Capitol take in the District 12 tributes, and at first, do nothing. And then, as if a spark has ignited, one by one, they begin to cheer. The horses continue to pull the chariot as he hears the crowd scream their names.

They are showered in an endless rain of flowers, and for once in his life, Gale Hawthorne knows what it feels like to be admired by all. And he hates every minute of it.

These people who act as though they will stick by his side until the end will be watching anxiously as the clock counts down and then cheer as someone is murdered in cold blood.

Even if it is him.

They won't turn their attention away from the screen while Gale is fighting for his life. Nor mourn his death as others will back home. And as time wears on, his name will be placed in their database, and erased from their memories.

The shout of his name is what snaps him back into reality. Gale turns to the crowd, flashing them a dazzling smile, but those who know him all too well can easily see the tension behind it.

His District partner, Aspen, no older than he, turns to face him, her expression giving nothing away. The only trace of emotion he is able to detect comes from her eyes, which are filled with worry.

He feels her hand give his a reassuring squeeze, and suddenly wonders why they are holding hands at all. It was his stylist's idea, to present them not as two individuals, but instead as a team. Inseparable.

But even Gale knows that as soon as the buzzer sounds, he is on his own.

* * *

His dreams are filled with nightmares, several involving his family. One was of Katniss, and, it's the one that scares him the most. For though Gale Hawthorne swore to let her go for her own sake, he knows that she'll always be on his mind, even during his last few breaths.

He once thought of Katniss as his sister. He cared for her, and would protect her just as he would his own family. And then, just six months ago, everything changed. She was no longer the scrawny girl whom he first met in the woods, the one who was gifted with the bow and arrow and as stubborn as a wolf. Instead, she was turned into the girl Gale thought he would be spending the rest of his life with.

Funny how fate works.

Gale turns to the clock. 3:52. He still has several hours to rest before training begins. His thoughts no longer revolve around Katniss, but instead circle his future opponents. After watching the replays of the Reaping, very few tributes caught his eye. It seems as though his main threats will be coming from the Career districts, and a boy from District 11.

These next few days he can waste, or he can gain actual experience. Though he knows he might not stand a chance in whatever twisted game the Capitol has planned, Gale Hawthorne will not go down without a fight.

* * *

He waits by her locker between third and fourth period, hoping that somehow, he can manage to convince her to walk to English with him. Already Peeta has tried to talk to Katniss multiple times, each and every attempt she ignores. She doesn't give him time to utter more than a word before vanishing once more.

He stands nervously, waving off his waiting friends who are staring at him in confusion. Kelsie Winters, the girl Peeta broke up with just a week before, walks by as well, her gaze aching with longing. But underneath her copper-brown eyes, something mischievous sits. Peeta knows her too well, and knows that the sweet and innocent personality is all but an act.

Something lets go of him as she walks away, as if Kelsie's presence has that type of power over Peeta. However, it's more of a relief than longing, unlike Katniss, who's somehow able to make his heart race just at mere sight.

He watches as Katniss comes to her locker, her eyes taking in everything in the hall. She has always been observant, if not cautious. Her hair is once again pulled back in a braid, no longer carrying the style she wore at the Reaping. She and Madge exchange quiet nods when passing one another.

Most have never understood their friendship, one that seems to contain more actions than words. But Peeta knows it all too well. His family's never been one for closeness, but even with that, they express their love through gestures, little things they do daily to help one another out. They are not as close as a family should be, but they are not as distant as they appear, either. And for Peeta, that's always been alright.

He catches a small smile as Katniss walks past Gale's old locker. It is a tradition in District 12 that if anyone from the Upper Level classes is chosen, students and friends write notes on their lockers, wishing them luck, to say a final goodbye, or even to apologize. It is for those people who still care about a person, yet did not have the heart to have to look them in the eye, knowing they may never return.

The notes are taken down when that person perishes, and are given to the family whose loved one was lost. Sometimes at the funerals, the parents or guardians even read the notes out loud. It is heartbreaking, but a reminder that they will never be forgotten, and that they will always be alive in their hearts.

Gale's has been plastered with many notes, most of which are from Gale's friends or girls which whom may have harbored some sort of feeling towards Katniss' best friend. And of course, there is one from Katniss herself.

And then she sees him.

The smile is gone, quickly replaced by a frown. She walks silently, opening her locker with ease.

"What are you doing here?" whispers Katniss, trying not to draw attention.

"I'm sorry about Gale," he blurts out, and mentally scolds himself. The whole point of getting to know her is to take her mind off of him, not remind her every time he talks to Katniss.

"I don't need your pity," she replies coolly. "And neither does he."

Their first conversation, and he is already ruining it. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Of course you didn't," she murmurs. "Nobody does."

"I talked to Gale the other day. When they let us say our goodbyes," says Peeta.

"I saw you. Why?" She asks, still not meeting his gaze.

"I told him that if anything happened to him, I would help your families out. He agreed." He can't help but feel guilty as he says this, knowing he is implying that he does not believe Gale may return.

And just as he expected, this sets her off. "Look, I don't know what's in it for you, but we don't need your charity."

"Katniss," he whispers, his voice soft. "There's nothing wrong with a little help."

He can see her mind wander off, and can't help but wonder if she is thinking the same thing he is. The day he gave her the bread. But even if she was, during that time, Katniss Everdeen did not show it.

But instead, says the one thing he'd thought he'd never hear, not in his lifetime, as she walks away.

"Thank you."

* * *

Two days later, she finally agrees to let him walk her to class. During the same time, she asks what she can do to repay him.

"Give me the chance to get to know you," is what he tells her.

"You don't want to know me," says Katniss, shaking her head.

But I do, he thinks, I've wanted to, for the past eleven years.

And what makes him smile the most is that she does not say no.

* * *

They wait in anticipation as Caesar Flickerman announces each of the tribute's training scores. It is only the middle of the evening, though in some districts people are barely returning home from work. The pain hits Gale unexpectedly, sharp and cutting. District 12 is one of those places, one of which he will never see again if he doesn't win. But after what he has done, the odds suddenly do not look so great.

He could care less of what they do to him. It is what they might do to his family, to hers, to every person, starving or not, that live in District 12. They already know what his home means to Gale. He talked with Haymitch over the issue, and in that discussion, Haymitch warned Gale of the consequences. He had even shared with Gale what had happened to his family after winning his own Games.

The Capitol had killed each of them, his mother and brother, the girl he loved, and had written it off as an accident. They spared Haymitch as a reminder to the other victors what could happen if they didn't follow the rules. For even after the Games, one will always remained trapped in the Capitol's hands.

Up until his private session with the Gamemakers, Gale Hawthorne hadn't been doing so bad. He excelled in making snares and swordplay, and though he wasn't exactly the strongest of the group, he had at least stood a chance against the Careers, unlike some of the others, who would be killed within the first few hours.

During his session, they hadn't been paying him any attention until he released that knife. In a fit of rage, he threw it, the knife appearing as though it was aimed straight at them. He never bothered to stop and think of what would happen next. It missed— he knew it would— and landed right in the middle of the wall behind.

Even when he himself wasn't aware of his actions, his mind had been. Gale made sure it had not harmed anybody. And though it did not cause injury, it let out a warning. To him, the Games were not taken as a joke. They meant the difference between returning home on a train or in a coffin, between life and death. Yet, it seemed as though the Gamemakers had been seeing it through another perspective. Up until now.

"Boy, what have you done?" Was the question Haymitch had asked constantly throughout their conversation. It was a question that not even Gale had the courage to answer, let alone face.

The number twelve flashed on the screen, and suddenly, he could no longer breathe. The minutes that followed after were filled with praise and thanks, though tension within the room still remained. For with every action, there is a consequence.

It was that training score that from which a spark had been lit, and because of that, a flame would soon be ignited. Whether it would burn or die was no longer an option. For the only way to truly fight back was to win, Gale knew.

It was on that day that a revolution began.

* * *

A twelve. Not even Katniss could've predicted Gale would be given a score that high. But there it is on the television screen. Vick and Rory high-five one another as Prim begins to spin Posy around in circles, the little girl squealing in delight.

She hears Hazel and her mother continue to talk quietly amongst themselves as they had been in the beginning. Only now, hope radiates behind not only Hazel's, but in everyone else's eyes, that Gale might return. It's in only one pair that hope no longer exists.

As soon as the special comes to an end, Katniss is out the door. Though it still summer, the cold air hits her full force. She shivers, though she knows it is only partially from the cold. She loathes it, being the rational one.

Katniss understands that there is a chance that Gale might not return, and though she might not accept it, she will be prepared when reality hits. But Gale's family, Prim, even his friends, she's sure that after seeing his score, they will not, and perhaps never will be.

Five minutes later, she finds herself sitting in the Meadow. Throughout the years after her father had passed, when she could no longer could take the gruesome deaths, the bloody battles, she had always ran to the safety of the Meadow, sometimes even the woods, and hunt or gather greens until she no longer had the images on her mind. But at night, they returned, seeming much more real in her dreams then they had been on screen.

But during those days, Gale had been right by her side. His presence was a part of what allowed her to leave reality behind. That night, Katniss had never felt more alone.

Until she hears his voice calling her from behind.

* * *

All three days in which the tributes had been training, Peeta had walked both Katniss and Prim home, not caring if he was late to cover his afternoon shift at the bakery. During that time, he learned that if there was anything that made Katniss smile, it was seeing the youngest Everdeen sister happy.

Most students in their grade had always thought of Katniss as unapproachable, even intimidating. It wasn't because she isolated herself from all her peers, excluding Gale and Madge, but rather due to the way of how she carried herself. The girl who he always believed to be fearless is not at all what he expected. Courageous, yet vulnerable, self-reliant, yet just about the most selfless person he has ever met.

He finds her alone in the Meadow the night they revealed the tributes training scores. She doesn't see him coming, and this surprises him, for he is not quiet at all when it comes to walking. It was even one of the things he joked about when Katniss mentioned the woods. Not wanting to sneak up on her in case she has her bow, he calls out her name.

"Peeta?" She asks, peering through the darkness. She doesn't object when he sits next to her on the grass, still wet from the light drizzle that had occurred earlier that day. Wildflowers are spread throughout, and even during the night, they give the Meadow a colorful appearance.

Peeta hardly comes here, but even he knows that during summer, the Meadow is one of the nicer places to visit. It is in winter that the Meadow, along with nearly everything else, is dead. During that time, to find beauty in District 12 is a rare and precious sight.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" he asks, looking around.

"Beauty doesn't last," she says curtly, not bothering to look into his eyes. "Neither does life."

"Nothing's permanent, Katniss," says Peeta.

"Scars are. Grief. Pain. When someone dies, they never truly leave you. Things like that are permanent."

"I take that back. Some things are permanent, and those are the type of things that we can't run away from. But so are things like love," he murmurs, trying to get her to meet his gaze.

"Believe it or not, but you're the second person who's said that to me," says Katniss.

He takes a deep breath. This is it. The moment that he is finally going to say what he feels, after nearly eleven years of keeping the words hidden in the dark. "I'm sure the first one didn't feel what I feel, though."

"What do you mean?" She looks up, puzzled. "You don't hate me, do you? We're friends, right?"

"Friends." Peeta takes in the word, tastes it. "Right." He forces a smile, only to have it falter in the end.

Friendship, he thinks, better than strangers.

But not better than love.

* * *

The interviews pass by quickly, but it's when Gale responds to the question if he has anyone special waiting for him back home that catches Katniss' attention. For his answer is none other than her.

It seemed as though everybody knew, because nobody gives it a second glance. Both the Hawthorne and the Everdeen family turn to see Katniss' reaction, as if hoping she smiles or blushes, that through all that time, they've been more than just hunting partners. But for several minutes, her face is expressionless.

By 6:00 am, Katniss is already crawling underneath the fence. She can no longer take Prim's hopeful glances or her mother's pestering questions, to which all she responds the same.

"We're just friends."

It's him who wants something more, she thinks. For two hours, Katniss is able to distract herself from Gale's public confession and focus all her attention on her surroundings. By the end of her hunting session, she has caught three rabbits and squirrels, and with the new type of snare Gale taught her how to knot, what appears to be a young badger.

Katniss heads to the butcher shop to trade one of the rabbits, and in turn receives four pounds worth of beef. She also tries to manage a trade with the baker, only to find that he along with two of Peeta's older brothers have gone to the market.

Peeta offers to trade, but she declines, knowing his mother will punish him if she discovers the two. And even though she gave him nothing, Peeta hands her two loaves of bread and shuts the door before she can even object.

She trades what is left at the Hob, and eventually heads home. Prim's eyes light up at the sight of bread, and Katniss begins to wonder if her younger sister has noticed yet another thing that she is still unaware of.

* * *

The boy who was on fire. All around Panem, citizens are whispering, and throughout first two days into the Games, the rumors continue to spread. It's not long before the quiet whispers reach the ears of President Snow.

Gale knows that with just a snap of the President's fingers, his entire district could be blown to bits, much like his father in the mine explosion. He is one of the few people who know, not assume, that the explosion was not accidental.

As soon as the countdown widget hits zero and the buzzer begins to sound, Gale Hawthorne is off. He and Haymitch had already discussed his strategy. He is to lie low for several days and let them play it out. Gale has enough experience and instinct on how to survive in the wilderness. And though he knows he could take down several tributes in combat, he does not want to risk injury.

The first tribute that is dead is the girl from District 9. The girl from District 2—Clove, he thinks, is her name— pulls back the knife plunged into the girl's chest, wiping it clean with a wrinkled cloth. Their eyes meet.

And it is not long before Gale is under her pursuit. He runs quickly through the field, grabbing a medium-sized pouch on his way. All around him fights are taking place, and with each minute that passes, more and more tributes fall to the ground, many of them are those who never stood a chance from the beginning.

Clove launches one of her daggers towards him, and in less than a second, he drops to the ground, barely missing the knife. He reaches for it quickly and stands up, pondering on whether or not to fight her. Gale knows he stands a chance against her, especially if armed, but knows he's better off not to let chance decide his fate.

He sees a dead tribute lying no more than several yards away, her killer bending down to pick up his weapon. Gale rushes over, slashing the boy if from behind. He turns around, expecting another knife heading his way, only to find Clove preoccupied with the boy from District 4. He grabs the sword lying on the grass and sprints towards the woods.

And for the first time since his father's death, Gale does not look back.

* * *

Katniss doesn't see it for herself, but as soon as she and Prim step onto campus, she knows immediately that something is wrong. And then she hears it. There's been a fight. Over her. Peeta, she thinks, and without warning, her eyes flicker over to his group of friends. He is nowhere in sight.

Both furious and sympathetic, she takes a seat near an old willow tree. Two girls stand behind, both who know Peeta fairly well. She takes out her history textbook, her eyes only skimming through the pages as she listens to their conversation, hoping to hear anything on what just occurred.

"Why would Peeta even defend her?" One girl asked her friend.

"I don't know. I thought she was dating Hawthorne."

The girl rolled her eyes. "Not even a week into the Games and she's already banging someone else. Those sluts from the Seam are all the same."

"Look at it this way, sooner or later, he's going to get bored with her and move on," consoled her friend.

Katniss quickly stands up and places her textbook back in her bag before walking away, once again unnoticed. It was all she could do to keep herself from punching those bitches square in the jaw.

* * *

His brothers were proud, his father was disappointed, and his mother was beyond furious.

Peeta didn't regret his actions, though. He tackled Carson Roberts the moment he had heard that bastard say her name and what he planned to do with her when Peeta tossed her to the curb.

And he would do it again in a heartbeat.

* * *

Gale jolts awake with a start, soon realizing that he is not at home. He is in the arena. Distinctly, he is able to make out the dying smoke that is being released from the fire he started last evening in hopes of luring someone in. Gale built a somewhat complicated snare he and Katniss often use to trap game with, but if made properly, it can also catch a human and leave them dangling by their feet. Not wanting to wait for someone to come by and have to kill them himself, he had also set the knife he had received from Clove to be released and stab the victim at a given point.

He knew when he heard the scream around midnight, just three hours ago, that his trap has worked. He didn't bother looking up at the sky to see the dead tribute's picture, for it would have only make him feel worse. But as he lay there inside a small nook besides the rushing stream, he cannot help but think that the tribute's death is just one more step in returning home.

It helps to imagine the tributes as animals, not people, when killing them. It is still sickening, but what a person feels after is not such strong a guilt as it would have otherwise been. But inside, Gale knows that his true motivations lie within his own family, Prim, and of course, her. His mind replays their last goodbye without his consent.

_"Gale," whispers Katniss against his shoulder, her voice low. "You have to come back."_

_He hugs her tighter, relishing in her scent. The smell of pine and moss, with just a hint of the laundry soap his mother often uses to wash clothes, will linger on him, even hours after. "Katniss, you have to be prepared for anything. I might not—" he begins, but before he can say anything else, Katniss interrupts him._

_"No. I'm not going to allow you to doubt yourself, Gale. You're coming back," says Katniss firmly._

_"I'm coming back," repeats Gale. He says it once more, but stronger, with greater confidence in him. "I'm coming back." To you, are the words that he cannot bring himself to utter._

_"Yes, you are. You're stronger than they are, Gale. Mentally. And that's where it counts," says Katniss, meeting his gaze._

_Without warning, he leans his head down slowly, stopping his lips just an inch away from her own. Gale hears her intake of breath, and finds her staring at him, confusion crossing her features. Gale has never hinted that he has wanted anything more than friendship from her, and suddenly begins to wonder if things would have be different now if he had. That the girl in his arms would not just be his hunting partner, nor best friend. She would have also been the girl who loves him back._

_"Katniss, I–"he is not given the chance to finish, for the door swings open._

_"Time's up," calls one peacekeeper, whom Gale recognizes as Darius._

_Just as two peacekeepers enter to escort Katniss out, Gale closes the remaining space between them and kisses her. Both his arms wrap around her thin waist securely, never wanting to release her. He can feel her lips freeze before his own, as if unsure, before she finally begins to respond. It is brief, lasting only several, blissful seconds before peacekeepers pull them apart._

_"Katniss, you have to protect them!" Gale shouts as Darius holds him back. And he knows she will. They made a pact, in what seems like a lifetime ago, that they would both feed and protect one another's families if one of them were to be reaped. He watches as Katniss struggles against the two peacekeepers. It does no good, but that does not stop her from trying to force them to release her._

_"I promise!" He hears her yell. Darius mumbles apologetically as he and the two other peacekeepers escort Katniss out of the room and slam the door, the noise causing Gale to jump._

_But no longer is he scared, nor angry. For the first time since his father's funeral, Gale Hawthorne feels something stir deep within him, the very catalyst that had driven him to accept his father's death with honor and courage. To continue on fighting for the things that made life worth living. The very reason why he had joined the brewing rebellion in the first place. Why his father, Katniss' father, and many others had as well._

_He soon realizes that what he feels is hope._


End file.
